Welcome to my life.
So this time last year I was about 30 pounds heavier and I felt terrible about myself. I was always really self conscious and I just hated the way I looked. I was also unhealthy and as much as I tried eating healthy, I gave up too soon and nothing was really working for me. I would go a very long time without eating, and then eat junk food later on and say to myself "Well, I didn't eat all day, so I could eat whatever I want now...", which was how I gained even more weight. I was always on the chubbier side, but I knew there was a problem when I was gaining weight in the summertime, when usually people lose it. My old "friends" also treated me like I had a disease, like I was an outsider because I was heavier than them. I come from a family that doesn't like to waste anything and always reminded me that people are starving, and my "friends" would purposely throw out a good amount of food in front of me, and I would be like "well if you're just gonna throw it away, can I have some?" and they would look at me like I had asked to eat their first born. They made me feel terrible, and as much as it killed me, I just told myself "it's not my problem" when they threw out a whole lunch. They created a new insecurity and I think that there's still a part of me thats utterly terrified of being the fat girl again (new school). Anyway, eating the way I did made me lethargic and I could barely exercise because I had no energy. So what made me change? Well, my unhappiness with my reflection led to a small (okay, huge) meltdown and I decided that I was done with feeling bad. I decided to lose the weight and get healthy and it made a huge difference and in the first two months I lost 20 pounds. Some people asked me what I did, and I told them: I cut out carbs (haven't had pasta or pizza since June), had GNC meal replacement shakes for lunch, didn't let myself snack unless it was fruit, had at least 8 glasses of water, and worked out 3 times a day. Eating like this gave me so much energy, that working out didn't tire me out as much. Also, exercise got so much of my stress out and I actually got addicted. As I got busier though, this became harder because I didn't have as much time to exercise. So I just stuck to my main rules and only worked out 4 days a week. Now that the holidays are over though, I need to get back to my original diet plan, because Christmas came with way too many treats. I obviously still have a little more ways to go to reach my goal, but I'm really happy I decided to change myself and I'm proud of what I've accomplished so far😊
If you're dealing with the same issue, or any issue for that matter, and someone tells you can't, it's only because they couldn't. I know I always say this, but you can be the change you want to see, no matter what the situation. Don't waste your time feeling bad.
Just because this way worked for me, doesn't mean it works the same for everyone else! Everyone's body is different, and the best way to see what works for you is testing out what foods make you feel what and what exercises work the fastest. Thanks for listening to my story. I can't wait to see what 2016 has to add to it:)
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Feminist, singer, writer, animal lover, actress, fashionista, tv junkie, shark enthusiast, wanderer, music lover, New Yorker, and most of all, human.